Healing

Death Changes You to Live Well

~ jodiheisz ~ 2 Comments

“The life you have left is a gift. Cherish it. Enjoy it now, to the fullest. Do what matters, now.”

― Leo Babauta

It was a clear and sunny spring day. The sky was bright with gentle blue gradients falling from the heavens to the earth. Two worlds colliding together creating a sense of peace and harmony bringing serenity to the hustle and bustle of the morning. 

But the tranquility of the moment came to a halt. The hospice nurse called me while I was at work. Before she spoke her first word, I knew why she called.

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Turn Pain Into Power

~ jodiheisz ~ 5 Comments

Not one of us escapes pain living in this world. Experiencing trauma, pain, disappointment, and loss is a part of being human. It’s inevitable.

When you’re in swirling in chaos and being swallowed by darkness, it’s hard to understand you will get through to the other side. It seems too impossible to comprehend or believe one day your pain will go away and happiness will appear.

But no matter difficult things are, you always have a choice. This pain you are experiencing is bringing you to a crossroad.

You can take the road to the left and walk the path of resentment, self-destruction, and victimization.

Or you can take the road to the right and walk the path of healing, empowerment, and transformation.

The choice is yours.

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Lost, But Never Gone

~ jodiheisz ~ 3 Comments

For the past few months, I’ve been feeling…lost. My sense of who I am vanished making me a stranger to myself. I thought I knew who I was moving forward in a specific direction towards my goals. But then out of nowhere, I was thrown way off path leaving me disorientated, unsettled and bewildered.

Have you ever felt lost and out of touch with yourself? Have you felt you were on the “right” path but then suddenly went astray moving into unknown territory? You knew for sure where you were going and where you were headed but unexpectedly, you veered way off course.

It’s unnerving and upsetting being lost in a chaotic and distressed world. Especially when you thought you knew where you were going. The notion to choose our destination and stay on track no matter what is drilled into us. Don’t get distracted. Don’t move your eyes from the prize. And heaven forbid, don’t look backwards. You are expected to keep driving down the road you started on at all costs. 

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Discover the Joys in Difficult Times

~ jodiheisz ~ 5 Comments

This is a very difficult year for many. Maybe one of the hardest. No doubt. We are all suffering from constant trauma, crushing stress and debilitating fatigue without much respite from the daily challenges we face. For me, I have trouble sleeping at night thinking about the division, hate, sickness, the suffering of others, climate change and the civil unrest in this country and worldwide. 

But in the midst of troubling times, there are gleams of light shining through muckiness revealing the joys hidden underneath. It takes intentional effort to see the goodness when all things seem dark and dreary. I know I find it extremely difficult to be positive and to see the limitless sky beyond the raging storm.

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COVID-19: WTF???

~ jodiheisz ~ Leave a comment

A riveting and captivating movie. My eyes locked on the screen with my hands gripping the seat waiting to see what happens next. 

The plot is about a coronavirus called COVID-19. This virus turned into a pandemic and has taken over the world. Across the globe thousands are sick and dying with the numbers growing by the second. 

Hospitals and medical professionals are overwhelmed with the influx of infected patients leading to lack of supplies, limited hospital beds and exhausted personnel. Doctors are forced to make the heartbreaking decision on who lives or dies based on the resources they have to provide the care patients need to survive. 

Grocery store shelves are empty with limited food, no toilet paper, no hand sanitizer and no cleaning supplies. Even the ice cream is gone! 

In attempt to control the spread of this deadly disease, the world stops with countries in lock-down. People’s lives are turned upside down within minutes. Businesses are forced to close leaving many unemployed. The stock market tanked with definitive signs of a deep global recession. Schools are closed leaving families to homeschool their kids. All sporting events, concerts, kid’s activities, museums, libraries, universities, weddings, tradeshows, conferences and more are cancelled. And the horrific list goes on…

But wait? Guess what?  THIS IS NOT A MOVIE.

IT’S REAL. 

WTF????

How could this happen? I mean seriously…don’t you feel like you’re living in science fiction movie? How could we experience such suffering financially, physically and emotionally on a global level? Why us and why now? 

It feels surreal like it’s not really happening but yet… it is.

I know you’re receiving lots of information about the coronavirus so I won’t take too much more of your time. We’re all trying process the drastic changes thrusted upon us in a short period of time. 

This experience is unprecedented. None of us have dealt with this before in our lifetime and never thought we would. Whether you think these changes are an overreaction or you’re feel overwhelmed, we are all suffering and in this together. 

I’ve been researching on how to deal with the pandemic and want to share these findings with you. The other day I listened to the Rich Roll podcast on dealing with the corona virus pandemic featuring Rich and wife Julie Piatt. 

Julie said something that resonated with me. “This is our divine moment.” Wow! Beautiful and true. This is our time to show our inner light, learn more about ourselves, be connected with humanity and to serve in deeper ways with humility and reverence. 

Here are the ideas I found to get through this challenging time of dealing with a pandemic and social distancing.

  1. Look inward using meditation. Learn more about who you are and trust yourself. Ease your anxiety with silence and creating mental space.
  2. Get closer to God. No more words needed here. 
  3. Help your neighbors, friends and family who are immune compromised or elderly. Go grocery shopping for them, cook a meal and deliver it or run their errands.
  4. Pray. Pray. Pray. Pray…. did I say pray?
  5. Do the hobby you always wanted to start but didn’t’ have time. Now you have no excuse.
  6. Work longer on the hobby you started because you have more time. Still have no excuse.
  7. Read, draw, write, paint or do something creative. Creativity is healing for the soul.
  8. Call your parents every day. They never get sick of hearing your voice. 
  9. Go outdoors and play with your kids, take your dog for a walk or go on a quiet walk by yourself to feel connected to nature. 
  10. Catch up on Netflix. No guilt allowed.
  11. Experiment with healthy meals. You’re not going to restaurants anyway.
  12. Don’t stop giving to charities or your church. Giving is healing.
  13. Try fun exercise programs online. Who knows? Maybe you won’t need to pay for that gym membership anymore.
  14. Give reverence to those who passed from COVID-19. Every life matters. They deserve to be remembered and honored.
  15. Be grateful for the medical professionals, truck drivers, grocery store workers, teachers and everyone working long hours to keep us healthy, fed, educated and taken care of.
  16. Don’t hoard toilet paper or food. Who buys ice cream when they’re trying to stay healthy? And don’t get me started on the toilet paper. Makes zero sense…
  17. Find humor wherever and whenever you can. The toilet paper memes! 
  18. Limit your time watching the media. They’ll make you crazy.
  19. Check out some online learning programs to expand your skills. Now’s the time to sharpen your abilities.
  20. Get some rest and good sleep. You have permission to sleep in on the weekends… finally!

Like what Julie Piatt said, this is “Our Divine Moment.” Make every second by serving and helping others, get closer to God choosing faith over fear, feel connected to the world knowing we are all one and be the light shining love to all.

Take care and stay healthy.

Creativity is Good for the Soul

~ jodiheisz ~ 3 Comments

“The desire to create is one of the deepest yearnings of the human soul.” 
— Dieter F. Uchtdorf 

Creativity has been a part of my life for as long as I remember. As a child I drew pictures, wrote short stories, recreated my favorite logos and sketched fashion design. I loved being creative. It was an escape into another world allowing me to explore new adventures and visit unchartered territories. 

I still love being creative. It’s safe to say I was destined to be the writer and graphic designer I am today using my creative abilities on a daily basis. 

My lifelong journey of being immersed in creative endeavors has showed me the value of creativity and how essential it is for the soul. When I am not creating, I get depressed. When I create, I feel alive. Creativity allows the space and time to connect to my true self with a sense of intimacy and meaning.

But what is creativity? Creativity is an activity that solves a problem. It’s the process of coming up with new ideas by making connections between concepts and unrelated things. You learn to see patterns across different mediums to read between the lines. Creativity takes your ideas and imagination bringing your dreams and vision to life with form, function and beauty.

The great truth about being creative is that anyone can do it. You don’t need to be an art genius like Picasso, Mozart or Leonardo Da Vinci. I don’t even come close their talents, but I still choose to create every day. You only need to give yourself permission and the time to develop your abilities.

God wants you to be creative because He is the source of all creation. Creativity opens your heart and mind allowing the Holy Spirit to work through you for inspiration and intuition. When God nudges you to create something, trust this. It’s His way of speaking to you making creativity a form of prayer and communion. It’s your opportunity to create something special for His glory and to heal your soul.

God wants you to express yourself in beauty, originality and authenticity. Creating is a method of communication for your soul to speak to yourself and to the world with your own unique voice. It helps you to learn who you are, the depths of your heart and the talents you possess. 

When you take the time to create, it allows you to be with yourself in solitude, peace and joy. It challenges you to try new things and overcome obstacles when things get difficult. When you create, it feels like time ceases to exist because you get lost in the moment being connected to God and your creation. 

Sometimes we stunt our creativity by doubting ourselves, setting unrealistic expectations, believing it’s a waste of time or thinking we don’t deserve to spend time being creative. No matter what the excuses are, let them go. Give your soul a chance the thrive and become alive with the spirit and energy of creativity. 

Some might say, I don’t have time to be creative. But you can always find time if you really want to. Instead spending an hour on Facebook, surfing online or gossiping on the phone, trade it with an hour of writing, drawing, painting, sculpting or taking photographs. Maybe let that load of laundry sit for a bit longer or do the dishes tomorrow morning. You can practice your creative skills by being creative with your time management.

Start with 20 minutes day. Over time, 20 minutes will turn into 30 minutes then 60 minutes. You’ll get into a groove making it easy to add more time. Once you feel the benefits of being creative and start to gain more confidence, adding more time will happen organically. 

God is calling you to create using your unique talents and abilities to bring more beauty and light into the world. Something you create might seem nothing to you but to someone else be a source of healing and joy. Your soul is begging for your creative heart and mind to awaken and become all who you are meant to be, to experience and to give. 

So get up and start creating today!

Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash

The Mother Myth: You Can Do It All

~ jodiheisz ~ Leave a comment

The Mother Myth of the century…you can do it all. You can have it all. You can be it all.

Bogus! Not true! False promise and a dangerous myth.

As much as we would love to do it all, have it all and be it all as mothers, the reality is we can’t. And we shouldn’t. 

It’s tempting to strive for the jack of all trades mother who cooks a full course meal every night, cleans her house from top to bottom, has a high-powered career, joins every committee at school and church, stay lean and fit year round, never yells at her kids, takes her kids to every sport and activity they want to do, walks her dog every day, does her prayer and meditation time daily without fail and oh yeah, does that side hustle in her “free” time. 

It’s exhausting writing this and gives me anxiety thinking about it. We put way too much pressure on ourselves to do it all, have it all and be it all. 

But this is not possible if we want to be peaceful and happy while making room for what’s most important. If we’re busy running around in circles trying to be the best at everything we do while trying to do everything, we will burnout leaving us with nothing left inside to give. 

I am here to tell you right now it’s ok to let go of doing it all, having it all and being it all. It’s ok to say no to being on the school committee or bake goods for the church bake sale. It’s ok to say no to the promotion because it requires more hours at work taking precious time away from your young kids. It’s ok to leave your house a mess for a few days or miss the load of laundry because your plate was already full.

It’s ok if you feel stressed and lose your shit sometimes. We all lose it but are afraid to admit it because if we do, we’re scared people will think we’re “that crazy mom” and not the “always has her stuff together perfect mom.”

Culture, Instagram, entertainment, celebrities, public figures and some popular bloggers paint this unrealistic picture moms should strive for. And if we don’t, we’re a failure and not living up to society’s expectations of what a 21stcentury mom should be.

The quest to doing it all and everything under the sun and stars leads to depression, anxiety, disappointment, anger and shame. But if we scale down and minimalize our lives by doing a few things that matter most, we’ll have more joy, peace, contentment, grace and love. 

That’s not to say you’ll never be able to some of the things on your list or follow all of your goals and dreams. Just not all of them right now. There are seasons in your life when it’s the right time for certain ventures. And there are other seasons when it’s not the right time.

For the frazzled moms out there feeling weary, overwhelmed, frustrated, tired and stressed beyond belief trying to do it all, have it all and be it all…let go of the striving and trying and just be. 

Just be in the moment and breathe deeply creating space within your mind, body and soul. Feel what’s right for you and what’s best for your family. If it means chopping your schedule a bit, don’t hesitate. Just do it. If you really want to do it all, have it all and be it all, live in this moment right here right now. 

Because you already have everything you need… right now.

Transformation is a Tough Job

~ jodiheisz ~ Leave a comment

I believe people can change. I know this to be true because of my own personal transformation. 

In the past, no one believed I could change. Many doubted my drive and passion to push myself to higher levels of consciousness. But no matter what anyone said or thought, I was determined to become the best version of myself and live aligned with God’s truth.

In my process of deep change, I learned transformation is tough and it’s the hardest thing you’ll ever do. It’s painful, slow, exhausting and sometimes lonely.

Transforming oneself is not for the faint hearted or the lazy spirit. It requires an enormous amount of energy and effort requiring you to dig deep into the dark crevices of your soul.

You need to be ready and willing with unwavering commitment for your inner revolution. You must be willing to show up to do the work, take 100% responsibility for your life and be honest with yourself about your strengths and weaknesses. 

But after the painful, exhausting and excruciating hard work of years of dedicated effort, its more than worth it. Waking up and being who you really are is one of the best things you could ever do for yourself.

I learned (and still learning) if you want to transform yourself, you must do these four things.

1: You must want to change: You can only change if you have a deep desire and will to transform your life. You can’t ish it or go half asked. You gotta be all in. You need to have a fire in your belly lighting up your soul to burn through everything needed to be healed and released. This passion will trump anyone’s opinion that you don’t need to or can’t change. Allow your strong intuitive sense to guide your decision and resolve this must happen no matter what. 

2: You must do the hard work to change: Transformation is very hard work. There are no shortcuts or life hacking skills to get around it. You must travel through the dark valleys of your soul and face your shadows with courage and honesty. You have to own all of your mistakes and past hurts taking full responsibility for them. You must feel the pain and move through your grief to let go of everything holding you back. This divine work on your mind and soul is a daily practice requiring you to show up again and again.

3: You must have a strong support system to change: Transformation does not happen on your own. You need a support system. Ask your family, friends or find a mentor to help. It’s vital to have someone you trust to point out what needs work and show you what your strengths are. Having a shoulder to cry on and a hand to hold through the tough times is key to making your transformation a success.

4: You must have faith in God or a Higher Power: You will not be able to transform on your own power. You’ll burn out way before you make any significant changes. You need the Divine to flow through you to give you strength, courage, energy and the grace to keep moving forward. Surrendering to this power signals to God you are truly ready for change, and He will help you transform way farther than you ever could on your own.

The journey of transformation is a long and arduous process. You must be in it for the long haul because there are no shortcuts to get you there. 

I wish there was a magic wand to change overnight, but it doesn’t work that way. It’s like a marathon running slowly to build your endurance along the way of moving towards your goal.

However, the goal of transformation never ends. It’s an evolving process made to challenge you to keep progressing and growing to higher levels of consciousness. It’s always about the journey, never about the destination.

But if transformation is so hard and never stops, then why do it? 

Because what lies on the other side of the pain, hard work, exhaustion and suffering is joy, love, peace, strength, confidence, trust, belief, compassion and deep healing. The reward is creating a whole and purposeful life being aligned with your truth at the deepest level. 

Transforming yourself into the person you are meant to be allows you to live with intention and walk the steps to fulfill your Divine mission here on this earth. 

When Depression Strikes

~ jodiheisz ~ 1 Comment

“When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.”
– Psalms 34:17

I am an eternal optimist and positive about life.

Most of the time.

But other times beneath my smile lies an inner struggle. A battle of dealing with depression and anxiety. When it decides to strike my life, it disrupts my entire world.

Many people don’t know about my struggle. I choose not to talk about it (except for my mom) because I want to spread love and light to those around me, not darkness and despair.

Depression and anxiety is something I’ve dealt with since childhood on and off throughout the years. But I make a choice to own it and take responsibility for it instead of wallowing and staying in the dark place. I choose to stay on the path of optimism in the midst walking through the muck.

For me, depression is like giving birth. Going through it is painful and excruciating. I feel exhausted and can barely breathe. I feel like I can’t go on for one more second. But once I embrace it, feel it and go through the emotions, I release it.

A new life is born out of the process of working through my darkest moments. I become more aware of who I am, what I need and what I want. I give birth to more awareness of self.

When depression arrives, it’s like a door swung open letting out a hungry ghost from a hidden, haunted room. I want to keep the ghost locked up forever. But, I know I must let it out to heal old wounds and past hurts pushed down deep inside.

Depression and anxiety hits most of us at some point in our lives. Here are some ways I deal with depression and hopefully these will help you too.

1: Read spiritual text. I read the Bible every day even when I don’t feel like. My go to scripture when I am depressed is Psalm 23. It’s an incredible healing always giving me hope and faith God will carry me through.

2: Pray. Ask God to heal your depression. Allow the Holy Spirit to guide you and show you the way. Trust that God loves you and wants what’s best for you. Knowing this gives you peace everything will be ok no matter how bad you feel today.

3: Meditate. Focus on your breathing for 10 minutes day. Sit in a comfortable seated position with your back straight, shoulders back, and eyes open or closed. Feel the inhalation and exhalation of your breath. Watch your thoughts come and go like waves in the infinite sea.

Drop off all worries, concerns, and stresses. Let every bit of it go. Breathing into this space helps to ease anxiety by relaxing and calming the mind in the present moment.

4: Get creative. Being creative is always healing for me. I am a graphic designer by day so when I work on a creative design project, I feel so much better about myself. For you, it could be painting, sewing, drawing, writing, or crafts. The process of working with your creative spirit is healing nourishment for the hurting soul.

5: Cooking. Trying a new recipe or cooking a favorite meal always makes me feel good. There’s something about cooking your own food in your own kitchen that makes you feel alive. Make sure the food is healthy so your body feels good too!

6: Spend time with family and friends. When I am upset, I don’t want to be around people. But I must. Being around loved ones pulls me out of the trenches into higher ground. I don’t need to tell them what’s going to feel better. Instead, it’s their joyful and loving presence that brings me up.

Don’t be alone. Find someone to spend time with.

7: Allow yourself to feel bad for a bit. It’s a myth we need to be like Pollyannas all the time. It’s a new culture norm you must be wildly and energetically positive 24/7. This is unrealistic and unhealthy. It’s fake positive.

There are times we need to feel the darkness to see the light. To process depression, you must go through it. It’s the only way to get to the other side. You need to keep swimming through the treacherous waters to reach the shore. Not treading water forever by staying in place. You must be committed to keep moving forward or depression will drown you.

8: Get physical. Workout, go for a walk, dance. Just get your body moving. Physical exercise releases feel endorphins, the feel-good hormones in your body. Plus, feeling healthy will help ease depression. I go to the gym and attend martial arts classes no matter how bad I feel emotionally. And I always feel better afterward. It never fails me.

9: Help someone. Being of service is one of the greatest healing elixirs. Seeing someone smile because you helped them will bring you out of the darkness. It makes you feel worthy knowing you can make a difference in another person’s life. It’s a win-win for both. You help them, they help you heal. It’s a beautiful combination.

10: See a therapist. I am not a doctor so I don’t have all the answers. But if you are suffering and can’t find your way out, see a therapist. There’s a stigma in society if we see a therapist, we are weak. But if you are honest with yourself knowing you can’t do this on your own, you are strong for reaching out for help.

During my divorce, I saw a therapist weekly for months. It was vital in my healing journey and wouldn’t be the woman I am today without it. There’ no shame but only healing and strength in getting help from a licensed professional.

If you are dealing with depression and anxiety, please know you are not alone. You are not weak, lame, stupid or crazy. You are still amazing, beautiful, smart and wonderful with lots of gifts and talents to share.

But no matter how hard depression strikes, you have a choice. You can choose to heal your life or you can choose to stay in the darkness. Don’t choose victimhood. Choose to heal your life and be the light with deep, unconditional love for yourself.

Featured Photo by Štefan Štefančík on Unsplash

Sisterhood Rocks…The Female Friendships Rule

~ jodiheisz ~ 2 Comments

20431237_10212243918727296_1571402650913900000_nThe power of female friendships (with the right gals) rocks.

We cry together when we are sad and dying deep in emotional pain.

We cry when seeing the pain on each other’s faces feeling it in our body like it’s our own.

We cry when we talk about the suffering and injustice of the world because we are compassionate, loving beings who believe in the value of humanity, peace and righteousness.

We laugh at one another’s sudden dumb moments (because we know we are smart 99% of the time).

We laugh at ourselves when being insane and ridiculous (we get crazy sometimes but that’s allowed every once in a while).

We laugh at each other’ jokes because we are hilarious (especially the inappropriate jokes for society’s standard for being women but who the hell cares… they are funny).

We laugh at asshole, idiot men (of course we do… because men can be asshole idiots. Not sorry guys).

We hug each other in praises of encouragement and give high-fives when we rock it.

We hug each other when a loving touch is needed to mend a broken heart and when we just…need a hug.

We give advice even when it’s not wanted because we want what’s best for our friends.

We ask for advice because we trust each other’s judgement and know we are smart, wise and honest.

We love each other kid’s like they are our own because we are family. The sisterhood friendships go deep in our blood and veins extending to our real blood family.

We almost went to jail that one, crazy night. If we keep it up…we still might…

The Sex and the City girls don’t hold a candle to who we are and our friendship. Hell, we are martial arts who kick, punch, fight, throw, arm bar and choke. Sorry Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte but we are the bad asses.

You listened to me for hours on end ranting, raving, whining, complaining, etc. Then again on the next day, the next week and so on. Ever since high school you never once you told me to shut up giving me what I needed…a trusted ear.

When I was down on my luck deep into emotional hole, a financial hole…hell I was one big, gaping hole, you treated to dinner making me feel special, loved and important.

If I am wearing an outfit I love but makes me look a stuffed Raggedy Ann doll busting at the seams, you tell me truth and to change clothes. Immediately. Now that’s true love.

You believe in me when I don’t. You tell me not to quit when I want to give up. You tell me the truth on how to improve, be better and to thrive.

You got my back, helping me stand straight and tall to move forward with confidence and grace.

You make me feel beautiful when I feel ugly and when my teeth don’t look right. You make me feel like I have a kick ass body even when I’m bloated looking like I’m six months pregnant.

You never judge, condemn or yell at me. But will tell me the hard-cold truth to save me from my mass destruction.

We stand together locking arms holding each other up to be strong, powerful and connected. We make each other feel safe to be who we truly are and to feel beautiful, sexy, hot, smart and fucking awesome.

And I love you all for that.